50-50

Liam, my little boy is fast growing up. Nowadays, when we tell him he's a good boy, he corrects us and tells us "No, I'm a big Kuya." Well, we're glad he's already aware that another one is on the way. I just hope that when Sam does come out already, he won't be having a hard time adjusting to the changes.

When couples start to have kids sometimes their kids are branded as either "Little Papa" or "Little Mama". For Liam's case, I really can't say he's a little Jeana nor is he a Little Alvin. He is a mixture of the two us, and I can say, the mixture of our best, not so good and funny traits at that!

For one, he is not entirely a carbon coby of his Papa or his Mama. Many think that I look like him, while others think, he looks like more his Papa. Personally, I think he got most of his facial features from his Papa, but the eyes are from me. Well, happy to have contributed something for him.

Next, on our traits. I already wrote about how I sometimes see myself in him, especially his tendency not to be settled until somethings are back in place. Like a door left open, a drawer of a cabinet left open. He'll really go out of his way to close it and fix it. Packing away as well is one trait he got from me. Thank goodness! Now, he also got his talkativeness from me and his being "masungit" at times, especially after waking up. You need to know the right way and the right time to start his day right. Liam also does not like eating "pangat" meaning "pangatlong ulit na" hehehe that is very me as well. He doesn't drink fresh milk too, which is very me.

Now, I think he got his intelligence from his Papa, which I admit, is something I have prayed for. Yes, I also did good on my studies, but I think it was more of the fact that I was a hardworking and diligent student than a naturally intelligent person, unlike Alvin. His love for music and the arts, he got from his Papa as well. His very good fine motor skills and not so good gross motor skills are courtesy of his Papa as well. His love for juices, chocolates and yogurts are Papa traits. He definitely has a sweet tooth!

Before we even got married, Alvin has always been the "taga-ubos" or "taga-simot" of the melted ice-cream or sundae we usually order for dessert. But one happy Sunday we were amazed and we just can't help smiling (or was it laughing?) when we saw LIam doing exactly that with his chocolate sundae from Hungry Jacks. Alvin was actually telling him to give the cup already so he can "simot" it but Liam didn't. He did it by himself. Ate all up to the very last drop. So, sorry Papa.

There are still a lot of Mama traits and Papa traits that we see in him every now and then. I can't write all of it but I'm happy to write some of it. Knowing that soon this will make me smile as I go down memory lane and reminisce how he was when he was a still a small boy.

As for our new baby, I will have to wait and see if like his Kuya Liam, she is a 50-50.

The Gift of Now

Last Friday, in our weekly household prayer meeting, our household head shared a very nice article of Bo Sanchez. It basically talks about the Gift of Now. Not worrying about the future and not fretting about the past and just enjoying the now.

The past couple of weeks I have been very busy tending to my duties and responsibilities at home. I was a mum to three kids, my niece and my nephew being with me most of the time since their Papa was in the US, then in London for work matters. That made my hands full. Very full. Not to mention that I am already five and a half months on my second (and last) pregnancy. I felt that I was slowly becoming a bit domesticated. I can't believe that I am what I am now considering that a couple of years ago I told my friends that I never see myself just staying at home. Especially after working very hard for my studies and my Masters. Well, God has different ways of teaching us valuable lessons.

Now, back to the gift of now. It has been lingering a couple of weeks now and I felt that the meeting we had last Friday was the climax of it all. A few days ago my friend's entire family met a horrible accident in Manila. As they have described it, it is a miracle that all of them are still alive. My sister-in-law also shared some stories of how her friend's daughter suffered from tuberculosis of the bones at such an early age (she's still in college) and how her niece, who is just 13 years old, died of dengue! In our short talk, we just came into conclusion that we really never know when our time is up. That in a snap of a finger we can all die. So my thirst to enjoy the "now" became more serious.

At present, I am torn. Half of me wants to enjoy the "now" but part of me also wants to prepare for the future. I want to spend more time at home, more time to travel, more time to spend with my family back in Manila, with my parents. But at the back of my mind, the bills, the expenses, the to-buy lists are ringing. I guess at this stage in our family life, we are still in the process of working our way to a more stable future for our children. And the two just contradicts one another. The past weeks I have been turning down calls for casual work and I am happy with my decision, but I know that I can't turn down all the calls everytime. Sooner or later I will have to work. So does that mean, there goes the gift of now? I don't know. At the back of my mind I don't want to worry anymore because I know (and He has proven it to me a GAZILLION times) that God will provide. But I am only human and worry sometimes catch up with me. So I still don't know.

Alvin shared a story which convinced me some more to enjoy the "now". It was a story which was shared by one of his officemates, apparently, when his kid was stil growing up, he spent too much time working, prompting his son to email him a letter with a subject: To the Dad that I never see. That was his wake-up call. I'd dread that day if and when one of my children will write a letter to me with that heading. But as I've mentioned earlier. I am torn, we are torn. It's hard to really enjoy the now, in the fullest sense and the way we want to enjoy it without me or my husband thinking about the future. All we can do now is to try to make the most of what we have now. Enjoying some of life's simple pleasures and simple luxuries every now and then, as life presents it to us, one at a time. I would love to enjoy my gift of now...if only it was that easy.

I'm Back!

I can't believe that it's been weeks...almost two months since I last wrote a blog! Can you blame me? No, blame it all on the hormones! Yes, I initially thought that this pregnancy would be totally different from my first one. As they say, each pregnancy is different. I kept a positive attitude about it and tried hard to remain happy. But the hormones are just so stubborn! Come my 5th week, it slowly caused havoc in my life! The past weeks has just been chaotic! Hard and terrible. Routines changes, activities changed, diets changed. Everything changed. Well,except for the fact that I am still heavy with my second child. On my 8th week, I thought I already had enough, but not, all the discomforts peaked up until my 11th week! Can't eat well. I was eating the bad foods and drinking the bad drinks (in moderation) or else I'd die of starvation. I lost weight. I didn't get to drink the vitamins I needed to drink because I just end up throwing up. Goodness, how did I survive all those days?

I survived because I have a very loving and caring husband who took the role of both the Dad and Mum of the household. When he comes home from work, he is in charge of everything! From the cooking to the cleaning to taking care of my little one, who is not so little anymore. And what about the time he is at work? Well, I have to thank my parents (who by God's grace was here in Sydney for a vacation during the past two months) who helped me with everything.

I am now on my 14th week and there are still days that I feel the bug and all the discomforts again, especially at night. But I think I'm on my way to recovery. I see myself doing some of the usual stuff every now and then...I get to work twice or thrice a week...do some household chores, eat (but this is still a challenge for me though), play with my son, do some things on my own. Slowly, I'm becoming normal again. Thank God. Now, I will try to enjoy this second trimester and not think of all the discomforts the third trimester might bring. Hopefully, in the coming days, I can finally and truly say, I'm back!

Fishing!

Yesterday was Easter Monday holiday and we went on a long drive to have a picnic and try out fishing for the first time. My cousin and my uncle has been telling us for the longest time that fishing can be quite addicting. It is one very relaxing activity where you find yourself in one with nature.

So I was really looking forward to this fishing experience. Of course, we didn't have any equipment with us yet. We had to borrow from my other friends and my uncle. I was actually surprised that they actually don't use worms anymore as bait for the fishes. What they used yesterday were chicken breasts with sardines sauce. So it was not really yucky to put the bait. Next, the equipment should really ba handled with care. If you break the rod (which are quite fragile)you are losing big bucks quickly. They are a bit expensive. The third thing that I have observed was that the size of the hooks matter. When some of the rods used bigger hooks, my uncle advised us that we should change it. If the hooks are too big we are going to have a harder time to catch our first fish. And lastly, we cannot just fish whenever we feel like it. We actually need a license to fish and we can't bring some types of fish or fishes which are too small. You can have spot-checked anytime. You have to follow the rules or you'll find yourself paying a lot of big fines. At the end of the dy we were able to bring home 6 fishes only. Most of the fishes that we caught were actually too small or prohibited so we ended up putting them back into the lake.

We had a wonderful time waiting for our bait to move a bit and retrieve the fish we have caught! Of course there were times when we were a bit impatient and ended up retrieving nothing. It was a relaxing and an enjoyable experience! This first time experience actually made us more excited to the next fishing trip we will have. Hopefully, next time, more fishes will be caught!

School Holidays!

Yipee! My two-week school term holidays is here! I welcome it with much glee! I guess having to work more frequently the last two weeks made me savor this break. This break is definitely a much-needed break for me, considering that I am starting to feel the pregnancy symptoms again!

So what is in store for me for the next two weeks? Well, for one, my parents will be coming over from Manila and will be staying for the next two months here in Sydney. Their visit means more travels during the weekends for our family with my brother and sister's families. Aside from being busy with our parents' visit I will be busy doing my back log for the house chores I have missed doing while I was working the past two weeks. These include - mowing, laundry, ironing, and cleaning of the house. The last one will take most of my time because it entails 1001 things (or more. It's just those small things put together that eats up all the time. The funny thing is, at the end of the day, you'd realize you'd be doing more the next day. You would not really run out of things to do when you're at home. May it be cleaning and organizing the cupboards or cabinets. Sorting the clothes, sorting the files, sorting the baby stuff, oh the list will be endless!

Since it's the school holidays by nephew and my niece will most probably stay with me and my son the entire day. So that's a baby-sitting job for me as well. No worries because they are a bit older already than my little tot so it's not so hard to take care of them whenever they are around. But we might go out every now and then to go to shops that offer kids' activities during the school holidays.

Cooking and shopping? Well, I think we still have to empty our freezer of left-overs before we start going to the shops again to buy some more food to eat and cook at that.

Readings. I promised myself that 2 weeks before I have my next meeting with my REd group, I should be done with my presentation. But up to now, thanks to nausea and acid reflux, I really haven't had the chance to sit down and read and concentrate on my studies. I need to be always two steps ahead because of my condition. I would also want to brush up on my reading on blogging.

Surfing the net.Facebook. Friendster. Multiply. Inquirer. Philstar. Job -hunting. Blogging.Computer addict? Maybe :)

Sleep and takes lot of rest. My body is telling me to and with my condition, I just can't ignore it.

There, I am pretty sure this school will not be a boring one! Busy days ahead for me!

Working Holy Week

It is actually not my first time to spend Holy Week here in Sydney. But last year, I was still too excited to see the differences on how we celebrate back in Manila since we just arrived here. Of course, there were the more obvious differences like people here are not so "in to in" like we Filipinos are. They don't have the "pabasa", a Filipino tradition where the elderly usually recall the Passion of the Christ by singing it from start to finish, continuously. They also don't have the Way of the Cross that goes around the entire neighborhood or community. They don't have Visita Iglesia. They don't have Pinetensya, where people with masked faces hit their backs with wooden sticks until they bleed as a sign of them asking for forgiveness.

This year was a bit different for me. For one, I didn't expect that I would be having a working holy week. As what I have posted in the FB status, I am not at all used to working during the holy week, but I am not complaining that I am. After all, these casual works are still His blessings. It was bit tiring. But more than that I was actually missing the practices that we had back in Manila. Then it made think, this set-up, working during holy week, is actually a good way to show what your priorities are. In Manila, you didn't have any choice because everyone is in Holy weeek mode. Everyone is quiet, reflecting, praying. You can't go out to the malls because most often than not, it will be closed. But here, you have all the reason to miss out on those activities because this is only one of the very few long weekends that you get to enjoy here (unlike in Manila, where there is a humngous amount of long weekends!). So people here, really grab that opportunity to go out and travel or unwind. I made me think that you can actually easily go with the flow if you don't have Him as a priority.

I don't want to sound like a self-righteous person but I believe that Holy Week is not something you spend on travels or parties. I believe that each one of us should allot a special time this week to reflect and to pray. This is just once a year! As I've said, I can't blame the people here.

Now, I got a little off track there, but going back, I was surprised to see myself working from Holy Tuesday to Holy Thursday knowing that in the past, I used to spend those days in Church already. Oh well, things change. It was a good thing though that even if I was working, I was still able to do some reflection through the student presentations that I witnessed in St. Andrew's Primary School in Marayong. Just watching the kids and listening to the songs really gave me goosebumps.

My holy week is still not done but work is. I am relieved. I am thankful and I pretty sure, sooner or later I'll get used to working during the Holy Week.

My Toddler and His Diet

I have seen and heard how my former co-teachers in Ateneo raised their concerns regarding their young children not eating well, missing out on those much-needed nutrients. Who would think that in a few years' time I would also have concerns regarding my son's diet.

I find myself sometimes feeling guilty whenever my son takes in more formula than solid food. He is now 2 years and 3 months and old and I think by this time, the formula should only be supplemental. But there are days when he just prefers to drink milk and more milk than take in real food. I feel bad whenever he does and I feel helpless.

Right now, my husband and I are trying out different tactics on how we can encourage him to eat with us and eat nutritious food. There are days when he eats a lot, and we feel that we have been successful. But there are days when we feel that we're back to square one.

I don't know what to do. I don't even know if this is just a stage and is very much normal for kids his age. Well, if it is, I hope that he gets over this stage soon. Real soon.

I think the most that I can do now is to continue to provide him with delicious and nutritious food at home. We are not giving up yet. Just like his swimming lessons, I think it's too early to give up. I'll continue to ask for advice from friends and continue to research on how to solve this dilemma, permanently.